Scripts for People Pleasers During the Holiday Season

Scripts for People Pleasers During the Holiday Season

Here are some polite, assertive, and empathetic responses that “people pleasers” can use to set boundaries while managing expectations during the holiday season. As always, please use these scripts as a guide and foundation to create your own responses in your voice. You can control what you say and how you say it. You cannot control how these messages are received.

• "I’d love to help, but I’m at capacity right now."
  
• "I appreciate you thinking of me, but I need to focus on [my family/myself/etc.] this year."
  
• "That sounds wonderful, but I have to say no this time."
  
• "Thank you for inviting me! I can’t make it, but I hope you have an amazing time."
  
• "I really wish I could be there, but it’s not going to work out for me this year."
  
• "I’d love to contribute a meal, but I can’t take on anything more right now. Is there something else I can do to help (or offer a specific alternative you can handle)?"
  
• "I can’t take on organizing this year.”
  
• "I understand this may be disappointing, but I hope you can understand my need to take a step back."
  
• "Let me think about that and get back to you."
  
• "That’s a great idea! I’ll need to check my schedule and see what’s realistic for me."
  
• "I can’t join for the full day, but I’d love to stop by for a bit!"
  
• "We’ve decided to start a new tradition this year and keep things simple at home."
  
• "I want to be honest about what I can handle this year."
  
• "I hope you can understand that I need to take care of myself so I can be present for the other celebrations."